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Listening: Do you really know how to listen?

25th Jun 2021

Listening

We take a look at ‘listening’. If you have ever had counselling or been in some sort of talking-therapy arrangement. Then you may well have marvelled over just how little your advisor actually said!

In contrast to what you often see on TV programmes as a patient/therapist relationship, where the counsellor asks lots of probing questions and a lot of ‘how do you feel about that’… In reality, a good therapist actively listens and gives the person, time and space to explore their own emotions.

Only Half-Listening

You may consider that you are a good listener… But, very often in a conversation, we can be only half-listening. The other part of us is already getting ready to share a similar experience. Perhaps input a witty anecdote or move on to a new topic? A good listener focuses entirely on what is being said. They are not afraid of the odd pause, while they gather their thoughts before asking a relevant question, getting the friend to further expand on the topic at hand.

Active Listening

This type of active listening is useful in so many areas of life. It makes partners, family members, work colleagues and friends feel heard and valued. It’s not always easy to listen, without feeling the need to guide the conversation. To bring it back to us in some way, or interject opinions. When you give people space to talk, you will find they fully elaborate and get everything off their chest that they need to say.

Difficult Conversations

Of course, some conversations are more light-hearted than others. But you usually have a sixth sense for when someone needs to talk about something more serious, even if they seem to be beating around the bush to some extent. If you find yourself in this situation, then follow these tips for a successful listening conversation:

  • You might find it easier to be out on a walk, people don’t always find it easy to open up when sitting in close quarters face-to-face.
  • Your body language can tell a person a lot about whether you are fully engaged in what they are saying. Put down your phone/work, and let the person know you are ready to talk.
  • Try not to fill gaps in the conversation. Let the person think and start talking again when they are ready.
  • You can of course ask ‘open’ questions, but sometimes a more useful technique is to clarify your understanding of what the person has shared with you, including perhaps how they might be feeling.
  • Remember, that the person probably isn’t looking for your advice or take on the situation. They may just need a safe space to explore what they are going through. The closer the person is to you and the more you care, the harder it is to not rush in and try and fix everything. But resist, as what is right for you, might not be right for them. Try and set aside how you might feel in the situation and what you might do and focus on what the person is saying.
  • It can be helpful to reinforce to the person your belief in them, and that you trust that they will know what is right to do for them. Often people have a gut instinct on issues, they just need a reminder to trust in their judgement.

Customer Comments

I had a lovely reading with Karen this morning. She gave my poi’s name immediately which is very rare with any medium. She also gave me a couple of other names. I felt reassured that I may hear from them again although I cried during the reading. She was very kind. I’ve had other readers who can be judgemental. Not this lady. She is kind and I felt reassured so much so now I want another reading!!

Paula

Karen

Karen

PIN : 5791

Good morning I have just had the most phenomenal reading with Mavis wow absolutely amazing everything what Mavis related to me I could honestly connect…  this lady is awesome how Mavis works communication explains situations please ring this lovely lady. Love And Blessings.

Susan

Mavis

PIN : 1010

John is so gifted, absolutely brilliant, the best medium I have ever known! He has assisted me and many others more than he will ever know xxx Thank you.

Jayne

John

PIN : 5152

Bryony is an amazing reader. She is a very lovely, friendly and honest reader. All of my readings have been done with insights and guidance. Bryony really wants the best for her clients and has supported me a lot over the last 4 years. I would highly recommend her. She’s the very best and does not ask lots of questions and always picks up on my situation now and in the future. Absolutely amazing lady.

Pamela

Bryony

Bryony

PIN : 2727

Just had a lovely reading with Angel. She is so kind and enthusiastic and willing to provide guidance. I felt that she was naturally gifted at being guided by her spirits.

Jodie

Angel

Angel

PIN : 1441

Thank you so much Sandra for assisting me connect with my beloved partner. You gave so much detail around things that only I would have known. You are really gifted and I am very much looking forward to speaking with you again. Love and best wishes to you x.

Krish

Sandra

Sandra

PIN : 2662

Thanks so much to John. I've had a few readings with John over this last year and he has really assisted me keep the faith in a situation that has all worked out as he said it would. His advice and insight was spot on and I can't thank you enough x.

Stephanie

John

PIN : 5152

Must report an astounding reading from John 5152. While I have been privileged to have received readings for many years and all have been so important this from John was more real than you could ever imagine. Relaying messages and comments that could only have come from those I once knew in life and are clearly unchanged in the other. Good work and so important. John has such an impressive gift.

John

John

PIN : 5152

I have had several readings with Karen, she has an amazing gift, her readings were spot on in every aspect, she is always cheerful and also a very caring person and has supported me with the loss of my husband. At times I was very down but after a reading with Karen I felt very positive. I can't thank you enough Karen you assisted me so much.

Jean

Karen

Karen

PIN : 5791

I have spoken to Mavis on several occasions and I have found her to be absolutely spot on with her guidance, it’s as though she knows me inside out. Mavis has given me a lot of support and I really enjoy my readings as everything she has told me has unfolded within days of our conversations. Mavis is not just a brilliant psychic she is I feel a friend who is there for me whenever I am worried or concerned about life's ups and downs. Thank you, Mavis you always amaze me, with your fabulous readings. Speak to you soon, xx.

Rose

Mavis

PIN : 1010

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