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Listening: Do you really know how to listen?

25th Jun 2021

Listening

We take a look at ‘listening’. If you have ever had counselling or been in some sort of talking-therapy arrangement. Then you may well have marvelled over just how little your advisor actually said!

In contrast to what you often see on TV programmes as a patient/therapist relationship, where the counsellor asks lots of probing questions and a lot of ‘how do you feel about that’… In reality, a good therapist actively listens and gives the person, time and space to explore their own emotions.

Only Half-Listening

You may consider that you are a good listener… But, very often in a conversation, we can be only half-listening. The other part of us is already getting ready to share a similar experience. Perhaps input a witty anecdote or move on to a new topic? A good listener focuses entirely on what is being said. They are not afraid of the odd pause, while they gather their thoughts before asking a relevant question, getting the friend to further expand on the topic at hand.

Active Listening

This type of active listening is useful in so many areas of life. It makes partners, family members, work colleagues and friends feel heard and valued. It’s not always easy to listen, without feeling the need to guide the conversation. To bring it back to us in some way, or interject opinions. When you give people space to talk, you will find they fully elaborate and get everything off their chest that they need to say.

Difficult Conversations

Of course, some conversations are more light-hearted than others. But you usually have a sixth sense for when someone needs to talk about something more serious, even if they seem to be beating around the bush to some extent. If you find yourself in this situation, then follow these tips for a successful listening conversation:

  • You might find it easier to be out on a walk, people don’t always find it easy to open up when sitting in close quarters face-to-face.
  • Your body language can tell a person a lot about whether you are fully engaged in what they are saying. Put down your phone/work, and let the person know you are ready to talk.
  • Try not to fill gaps in the conversation. Let the person think and start talking again when they are ready.
  • You can of course ask ‘open’ questions, but sometimes a more useful technique is to clarify your understanding of what the person has shared with you, including perhaps how they might be feeling.
  • Remember, that the person probably isn’t looking for your advice or take on the situation. They may just need a safe space to explore what they are going through. The closer the person is to you and the more you care, the harder it is to not rush in and try and fix everything. But resist, as what is right for you, might not be right for them. Try and set aside how you might feel in the situation and what you might do and focus on what the person is saying.
  • It can be helpful to reinforce to the person your belief in them, and that you trust that they will know what is right to do for them. Often people have a gut instinct on issues, they just need a reminder to trust in their judgement.

Customer Comments

I have used this site for many years and spoke to many readers who are all very good but Robbie is simply the best and so talented, spot on with everything and a really nice person, he connects with your spirits and tells you honestly what’s going on, a great medium and a lovely man, thank you Robbie.

Annette

Robbie

Robbie

PIN : 3443

I had a reading with Teya today. I was blown away by her understanding of my current situation. She made some very positive predictions and advice. I look forward to the outcome. Teya has a lovely warm personality and it radiates in her voice. Towards the end of the reading at my request she brought through some family members who passed over. I found her descriptions and messages spot on! I would love to connect with her again. Many thanks.

Mary

Teya

Psychic Medium Teya

PIN : 3691

I had my first reading with Vanessa today. I was very impressed that she brought my late father through and described him in great detail. Vanessa has a lovely empathetic manner. She picked up in great detail my current situation and described a wonderful outcome to my questions. I was blown away by her understanding of myself as a person! She gave me a tremendous boost to my wellbeing.

Mary

Vanessa

Vanessa, PIN: 3900

PIN : 3900

John is so gifted, absolutely brilliant, the best medium I have ever known! He has assisted me and many others more than he will ever know xxx Thank you.

Jayne

John

PIN : 5152

Bryony is an amazing reader. She is a very lovely, friendly and honest reader. All of my readings have been done with insights and guidance. Bryony really wants the best for her clients and has supported me a lot over the last 4 years. I would highly recommend her. She’s the very best and does not ask lots of questions and always picks up on my situation now and in the future. Absolutely amazing lady.

Pamela

Bryony

Bryony

PIN : 2727

Just had a lovely reading with Angel. She is so kind and enthusiastic and willing to provide guidance. I felt that she was naturally gifted at being guided by her spirits.

Jodie

Angel

Angel

PIN : 1441

Thank you so much Sandra for assisting me connect with my beloved partner. You gave so much detail around things that only I would have known. You are really gifted and I am very much looking forward to speaking with you again. Love and best wishes to you x.

Krish

Sandra

Sandra

PIN : 2662

Thank you, Ruth, for being so patient and kind on our call. You touched on things I needed to hear and I was so happy to hear from the one person I was seeking guidance from. I will be back. Your gift has opened my eyes up more than you know. Thank you xx

Hollie

Ruth

PIN : 2022

Thanks so much to John. I've had a few readings with John over this last year and he has really assisted me keep the faith in a situation that has all worked out as he said it would. His advice and insight was spot on and I can't thank you enough x.

Stephanie

John

PIN : 5152

Must report an astounding reading from John 5152. While I have been privileged to have received readings for many years and all have been so important this from John was more real than you could ever imagine. Relaying messages and comments that could only have come from those I once knew in life and are clearly unchanged in the other. Good work and so important. John has such an impressive gift.

John

John

PIN : 5152

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